Two perspectives. One shared responsibility.
Parent Mental Health Day, on 30th January, is not just a moment for awareness, it’s a moment for encouraging openness and meaningful shared understanding. For listening carefully to the experiences of parents and carers, and for examining how workplaces can either ease or intensify the pressures families carry every day.
To mark Parent Mental Health Day, Leeds Mindful Employer Network brings to you two perspectives sat side by side.
One comes from close, day-to-day work with parents and with businesses and organisations who wish to support working parents well, through the voice of Power of the Parent Founder, Charlotte Speak.
The other comes from an employer actively putting that intent into practice. Oakland is only the third organisation in the UK to achieve the Careers After Babies Award; a recognition that reflects sustained attention to how parents actually experience work, not just what policies promise on paper.
Together, these perspectives show both the reality parents are navigating, and the responsibility — and opportunity — employers have to respond.
The reality parents are navigating
Charlotte, you work closely with parents through your work at Power of the Parent — what first drew you to this space, and why do you believe parents’ mental health deserves specific attention from employers?
It came from a very personal place. I had one heck of a bumpy time becoming a parent in the workplace. I knew deep down that I still added value,
Charlotte Speak, Founder of Power of the Parent
had ambitions and could do a great job – but the environment I was in, and the societal narrative got the better of me. It was a quick way to feel disconnected to who I was, and because we live in a world that peddles beliefs around ‘losing yourself’ being not only normal, but expected, when you become a parent, I believed it.
The foundations of mental health support work really well for parents and it doesn’t need to be something we give ‘special treatment’ to. Ironically, that’s why I think it needs specific attention right now – because we’ve made it out like it’s a mystery to solve and filed under ‘too complex’, so it can get shelved or assumed it’s not a workplace conversation all too quickly.
Pressures that often stay invisible at work
From your work with parents, what pressures are they carrying right now that most employers don’t fully see or understand?
Being a parent right now is complex – we’re routinely told how we’re failing, we’ve got more ‘advice’ at our disposal than any previous generations and looking after our children’s safety is no longer reserved for ‘what time do I need to be in for my tea?’.
We’re expected to work like we don’t have children, and expected to parent like we don’t have a career. That’s a recurring pressure that can leave even the most relaxed of us scratching our heads.
The pressure of different family set-ups is something I still see going relatively misunderstood too. Single parents, co-parenting, kinship caring, different routes to parenthood – there’s a vibrant mix to navigate and they all have an impact on the day-to-day mental health of the people we’re sitting next to, and are on calls with, every single day.
The world of work is noisy right now too. You don’t have to look far to see people struggling to find employment, so the pressure to hold on to a secure role (as secure as things are right now) is in sharp focus. People giving their all and burning out in the process is something that’s going to have a profound impact in the workplace.
Why this matters — even when parents are still “doing the job”
What impact does parental stress or poor mental health have on performance, engagement, and retention — even when parents are still ‘doing the job’?
Bluntly, we need to remember as employers there’s a very real commercial impact and business performance suffers. The cost to recruit, the impact on the wider team if you don’t act quickly, your reputation as an employer – all numbers and stats you want to keep on the right side of.
It is of course the right thing to do for an individual, but I understand sometimes we need to address the money side of things too.
We have to remember that two things can be true at the same time, but we need to be honest about the impact of them co-existing. Someone can be struggling with their mental health and they can still be pushing through. It means you might not see it until it’s hitting deeply and your once sparkly-eyed and engaged team member is looking depleted and not knowing how to come out the other side.
Where well-meaning support can miss the mark
What are the most common mistakes you see employers make when they try to support working parents?
Assuming line managers will ‘just know’ what to do. They need help too, because they’re leading people they’re worried about saying the wrong thing to, or feeling like they have to know the answers to everything, immediately. They don’t need scripts, they need practical guidance that helps them navigate policies whilst meeting their valued team members in day-to-day reality.
Another common one is trying to build something without the full picture. It’s not uncommon for me to hear from employers that they’ve come up with solutions before speaking to their employees about pain points, what they’d expect to see or ideas on what works. I understand why – the pressure to be on the front foot is real. But there’s a difference between responding, reacting and flying without instructions.
A final one I’ll share here is driving the narrative of ‘special treatment’. It creates a ‘them and us’ culture quicker than you can say engagement survey. The foundations of mental health support can be consistent, and the specific situations will then bring about more focused assistance. This is more about helping people when they need it, and that providing to one person doesn’t take away from another.
Leadership, honesty and psychological safety
How important are managers and senior leaders in creating an environment where parents feel able to be honest, without fear that it’ll count against them?
They’re incredibly important. Pivotal. Essential. Your not-so-secret-sauce.
Let’s remember psychological safety is a scale – every team will have it, it’s a question of how high or low. People are of course allowed boundaries, but if they can’t share what they’ve got going on when they want / need to, you’re making life so much harder for everybody concerned.
How many times have we heard people say they felt like they had to carry on because asking for help or sharing they were struggling with something would have been held against them? Maybe you’ve thought it yourself. You wouldn’t be alone. Line managers and leaders can be the linchpin when it comes to making sure that doesn’t happen. They’re in a position of power and influence that can be used for good.
Why early support matters
Why is it so important for employers to support parents’ mental health early, rather than waiting until someone reaches breaking point?
We’re already fighting against narratives that rest needs to be earned and asking for help is a sign of weakness. The problem is, the longer we leave it, the longer the recovery may take. And why would we want that for someone?
Going in early sends a really strong signal – you’re supported, valued and not just another body on a seat. That’s the stuff of psychological safety and workplaces that people want to be part of.
A challenge for Parent Mental Health Day
On Parent Mental Health Day, what’s the one thing you’d like employers to stop, start, or rethink when it comes to supporting parents?
I’d love them to remember (perhaps rethink) that this isn’t a moment in time or a one-size-fits-all.
If you don’t engage properly with this topic for another 364 days, that’s a problem. And if you assume all parents will face the exact same mental health and wellbeing experiences, there are assumptions you need to shake.
How can you make the support mechanisms really accessible (in every sense)? Is it easy to find what’s available if you’re not quite ready to ask for help? Are there different formats of support knocking around?
There’s a rich tapestry of options out there – let them flow through!
Charlotte Speak is the founder of Power of the Parent, where she partners with organisations to craft workplaces where parents and the business can thrive. You can find free resources and practical ideas through the website, www.power-of-the-parent.com or connect to Charlotte on LinkedIn.
What it looks like when employers respond
Charlotte’s perspective highlights what parents are experiencing and what often gets missed. Oakland’s perspective shows how listening to those realities can shape practical, human decisions inside an organisation.
Supporting parents in a demanding consulting environment
Can you tell us a bit about Oakland and why supporting working parents has become such a clear priority for the business, particularly in a consulting environment that isn’t always 9–5?
One of the ‘Oakland babies’ whose parents/carers have benefitted from a workplace which has achieved the ‘Careers After Babies’ award.
At Oakland, many of our team are parents, juggling busy home lives alongside ambitious careers, and we don’t believe those two things can (or should) be separated. As part of our commitment to being a truly inclusive employer, we’re always looking at how we can better support people in balancing work and home life. After all, our people are the backbone of Oakland’s success.
We’re very open about the fact that consulting can be fast-paced and demanding. The traditional 9–5 doesn’t always apply, and client needs can be unpredictable. But home life is just as unpredictable from last-minute school closures and sick children to the everyday logistics of shared parenting.
That’s why we work closely with our team to offer as much flexibility and support as possible. From flexible hours that allow for school drop-offs and pick-ups, to understanding when life throws up the unexpected, we aim to reduce unnecessary stress wherever we can. We also have clearly documented parental leave policies, so everyone knows what support, solutions, and resources are available to them.
This approach doesn’t just benefit our teams and their families, it strengthens our culture and engagement. It’s one of the reasons we consistently deliver for our clients and why our NPS (Net Promoter Score) is among the highest in the industry. Happiness is infectious, and our clients feel the impact of working with people who know they’re supported.
What parents actually need — not what employers assume
You’re only the third company in the UK to achieve the Careers After Babies Award. What did that process surface for you about what parents actually need as opposed to what organisations often assume they need?
One of the biggest learnings was that supporting working parents isn’t always about big, expensive initiatives. Often, it’s the smaller, more human changes that make the biggest difference.
A great example is our internal Parents’ Teams channel. It might seem like a small thing, but having a space where people can ask for advice, share recommendations, or simply let off steam has been incredibly valuable. That sense of community really matters.
The award process also reinforced that there’s always more we can do. Through comprehensive assessment and honest employee feedback, we’re able to understand what parents actually need to thrive rather than relying on assumptions.
Flexible working, clear and consistent communication around parental leave, and practical support all help build confidence. Returning to work after parental leave can be one of the most challenging periods in a new parent’s life, as they navigate a new balance between work and family. Feeling supported, listened to, and understood makes all the difference.
Policies, people and confidence
You’ve introduced a mix of flexible working, structured re-onboarding, improved paternity leave, and practical facilities. What difference have you seen these changes make for parents returning to work and for the wider business?
Flexible working has long been part of Oakland’s culture, but we’ve continued to build on this with enhanced paternity and shared parental leave. This gives parents more time to be with their children and removes some of the pressure that can come with returning to work. We’ve also created a genuinely welcoming environment for returning parents, including practical facilities such as a dedicated breastfeeding room to support office visits, feeding and pumping.
Alongside this, our parents’ community enables people to share experiences and offer peer support, while additional resources are clearly signposted and accessible to everyone. We also offer third-party coaching to support parents as they transition back into work.
Together, these changes help parents return with confidence and that sense of security benefits the wider business too.
Leadership, visibility and trust
Leadership visibility is a big part of your approach. Why was it important for leaders at Oakland to talk openly about family life, and how has that shaped culture and trust?
Many members of our senior leadership team are parents themselves, so they understand first-hand the realities of balancing a demanding career with family life. That empathy has helped make conversations about family completely normal at Oakland.
Our leaders openly share their own experiences, which creates a culture where people feel comfortable discussing their needs and asking for support without fear of judgement. Seeing role models who are succeeding professionally while prioritising family life sends a powerful message, particularly to those earlier in their careers.
Our values matter deeply to us. They’re not just posters on the wall; we live and breathe them. One of those values is love. It might sound unusual for a consultancy, but love runs through everything we do, even when it’s not always easy.
The human side of support
Support for parents often focuses on policies, but you’ve also invested in coaching and peer groups. How do those human elements support parents’ mental health, particularly during big transitions?
Simply knowing you’re not alone can make a huge difference. Having a network of colleagues with shared lived experiences is reassuring and brings people together.
We actively encourage openness and vulnerability within our teams, alongside clear signposting to additional support and resources when needed. Those human connections combined with professional support play a vital role in protecting parents’ mental health, especially during periods of significant change.
A final lesson for employers
For employers who want to support parents better but don’t know where to start, what’s the single most important lesson you’ve learned from this journey?
Don’t make assumptions. Ask your people what they need. Seek direct feedback not only from current parents, but also from employees who are planning their families. One size does not fit all, and listening is the most powerful place to start.
Employee perspectives:
- “Oakland’s flexibility made an enormous difference. Without it, I’d have had to make some incredibly difficult, career-defining decisions. Instead, I was able to take the time I needed to care for Maxi and Ash, knowing there was still a seat for me at Oakland when I came back.”
Mike Le Galloudec, Principal Engineer - “Improved paternity leave really helped me feel able to take proper time off and be there for my little one without the financial worry in the back of my mind.”
Rian Hoey, Talent Lead - “After a difficult pregnancy, knowing my line manager and team were only concerned about my health and were so incredibly supportive took away a huge amount of stress and worry.”
Ella Smith Dunn, People Partner
Thank you to Power of the Parent and Oakland for contributing to this blog.
Charlotte’s perspective shows what happens when parents are left to carry complexity quietly — navigating identity, pressure and responsibility while still being expected to perform. Oakland’s experience shows what changes when organisations choose to listen, act early and design support around real lives rather than assumptions. Together, they make the same point from different angles: supporting parents’ mental health is not about special treatment or one-off initiatives, but about creating workplaces where people can be honest, supported and able to stay engaged for the long term. Parent Mental Health Day is a reminder — but the real work happens in what employers do on the other 364 days of the year.
Find out more about Power of the Parent’s support offer for parents and for organisations.
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